Sunday, March 28, 2010

Why I Hate Airplanes

On our recent trip to Hawaii, we had the opportunity to spend one day in Portland, Oregon, courtesy of Delta Airlines.

Normally, Portland would be great. It's a beautiful city! But when you are supposed to be in Hawaii, Portland isn't so cool.

I HATE airplanes. I hate them. They scare me. So as we were flying from Portland to Honolulu, I was already jittery and anxious. But then after a half hour in the air it felt like the plane was spinning around. I saw the sunset out our window, but minutes before I could see it out the window of the other side of the plane.

I got even more jittery. In a panicked voice I said to Mel "We are turning around. We are turning around!" She tried to calm my fears and basically said to chill out.

Five minutes later the pilot came over the intercom and said that one of the two hydraulic engines went out so we were returning to Portland. I became a nervous, quivering ball of panic. My heart felt like it was going to pump out of my ribcage.

But what REALLY freaked me out is what we saw as we approached the airport. I saw a line of firetrucks speeding down the road. As we finally reached the runway we saw that it was lined with firetrucks and ambulances. Ugh.

After waiting for a while in the terminal, they said they didn't have the part they needed. So they were going to fly it in from Minneapolis, Minnesota!!! That would take a few hours, then the repair would take a few hours, so they thought we'd be departing by 1:00 am (6 hours later). But Delta was compassionate enough to give everyone a $7 meal voucher.

FYI: $7 in an airport will buy a bottle of Coke.

But gets better!!! We were exhausted and tried to get a little sleep on an airport bench as all the other happy passengers walked by.

4 (FOUR!!!!) hours later they cancelled the flight and told us they would try to reschedule for the next day. We waited in another ridiculously long line to get a hotel voucher. Mel could hardly contain her excitement.

So this is how our 7-day vacation in Hawaii turned into a 1-day in Portland / 6-day Hawaii vacation. It will be a long time before I get on another airplane. Or go to Portland.


Dansie Family said...

scary! glad you survived to tell us the tale.

Tonya Mae said...

Sounds awesome, man! lol

Tonya Mae said...

P.S. You should write books, Cory. I like your writing style. :)