I visited the Walmart Vision Center yesterday to select among the finest eyeware my special pair of $30 glasses. I've always enjoyed shopping as much as a pencil jabbed into the ear canal, so I spent a few minutes to choose some frames that looked okay, and then I was ready to go.
If I had only known what my eyes were about to behold.
I sat at the desk across from the optician while she typed in my order. Then a guy walked up to the cash register to pay for some contacts. This man wasn't exactly what you'd call a "Babe Magnet", (trust me, it takes one to know one. Babe magnet...I'm not.)
Then in plain view, before God and lots of other Walmart shoppers, he inserted his pinky finger into his nose. And then began digging around like he was searching for lost treasure. His finger was inside his nose for an obscenely long time.
Then....he pulled his finger out. Looked at it. And apparently didn't see what he was hoping to find. So back again went the pinky finger! I ain't kidding you.
This time it plunged deeper. I was waiting for his nuckle to disappear inside his nostril. I wondered if he was trying to scratch his brain stem.
But what made me nearly toss my lunch was realizing that those are the kind of fingers that touch the buttons on the credit card machine right before I do.
One more brain scratching and they would have needed to call over the intercom "Can we get a clean-up in the Vision Center? Cory Reese barfed all over the floor. Bring a mop for this one."