Sunday, September 20, 2009

Walmart Wierdness

I saw something shocking as I walked into Walmart a few days ago. I wished I had my camera with me. This was something you had to see to believe.

Near the entrance there was a stand holding plastic bags. But they weren't grocery sacks. They were......(wait for it)........Umbrella Bags. They were elongated, thin plastic bags with a picture of a wet umbrella on them, and clearly marked "Umbrella Bag". Free for the taking....just in case anyone had a wet umbrella.

I tried to figure out the likelihood that one of these Umbrella Bags would actually be needed at the St. George Walmart. A bag would be useful if:

1) It actually rained (which happens about 3 times a year in this area), then
2) You happened to be going to Walmart in alleged rain storm, then
3) You thought it was raining so hard you actually needed an umbrella, then
4) You actually owned an umbrella, then
5) You were female (heaven knows a man ain't taking an umbrella anywhere with him unless ordered to by a female), then
6) You were disturbed at the thought of having a wet unbrella in public.

If I'm figuring correctly, the possibility of a Walmart customer needing an Umbrella Bag is approximately 0.0017248 %. Next thing you know, some moron will design an umbrella for pets.