Wearing Ice Cream

A few nights ago my wife and I went on a date. We go on these dates every so often. Our dates involve:
1) Getting the kids to bed.
2) One of us running to Dairy Queen.
3) Sitting in bed watching a movie and eating ice cream.

But I wasn't very successful in my task of driving home with two carmel sundays. The problem was that I didn't have anywhere to put them while I drove...so I'm trying to drive home with a sunday in each hand while my knee maneuvers the steering wheel. Well....that plan works just great until you have to turn.

And then you are forced to try and hold two sundays in one hand while you make the turn. Unfortunately, by this point, the ice cream started to melt a little, and eventually got the best of me. Grrrr.

So I got home with a lap full of ice cream.

Full Moon Rising

Last week I pulled in our driveway just in time to see an incredible full moon rising over Zion National Park. Thankfully I had time to run inside and grab my camera and snapped this picture:



The funny part is that the kids were mesmerized by the moon too. In fact, Danica thought it was so awesome that she went outside early the next morning to see the moon again. But - she forgot to unlock the door as she walked outside. So when she tried to come back inside - yep - the door was locked. It was cold outside and apparently it took a while before one of the other kids heard her pounding on the door. I'm guessing she won't make that mistake again.

Why I Am Tired

Wednesdays in the life of Cory Reese are crazy. My wife works Tuesday nights so on Wednesdays I am Mr. Mom.

The joke in the extended family is that I run a little side business called Toby's Taxi Service where I shuttle kids around all day. I give props to all you moms who do this everyday because it wears me out. Let me give you an idea of my Wednesdays:

1) Kids wake up. Get them breakfast, stack dishwasher (if you're lucky), get them dressed for school, make sure homework is signed off, get their lunches packed, then off to school they go.

2) During the day I either help in their school classes or volunteer with my peeps at Dixie Care & Share.

3) Hopefully sneak in a run late afternoon.

4) Pick up kids from school, get some after-school snacks, help one daughter with homework while reminding the other daughter to practice piano, then switch.

5) 4:55pm: Take the girls to piano and pick up Jackson from piano. Get home and have 20 minutes to eat something before leaving at 5:30pm to pick up girls from piano.

6) Take girls to gymnastics at 6:00pm, finished at 7:00pm.

7) Bring them home, get them set up with a late dinner, finish homework and reading, get showers done, remind them politely 6 times to brush their teeth (the following 36 reminders aren't as polite). Then get them to bed.

8) Hope that there is still enough energy to dig the ice cream out of the freezer before falling asleep.

Dear Wind: Please Stop

I would like to inform you that I am utterly and completely sick of wind. And I am no amateur when it comes to wind. I lived in Wyoming for two years for crying out loud. When people move out of Wyoming they stand with a slant because their bodies are so accustomed to leaning into the wind so they don't blow over.


They weren't fooling around when they named our city - Hurricane. I totally understand that some wind is to be expected. But when it is crazy windy for approximately 359 out of 365 days each year, well, my friend, that is just plain nuts. Nuts.

Looking out our kitchen window into the back yard is depressing right now. The back yard is packed with tumble weeds. And I just can't bring myself to venture into the back yard to remove them. That seems like such an act of futility because I know that it won't take long before it is full of tumbleweeds again. It's just not right.

But it could be worse. Many houses in our neighborhood have been swallowed by tumbleweeds. Here is one such house:


Dear wind, please stop. We surrender. You win. Game over. Stop.

Books On The Night Stand

I go to the library often and it is constantly an overwhelming experience because I always find so many books I want to read. I love to learn. Not so much into fiction books. The biggest problem I have is finding the time to read everything I want to read. Here are the books currently on my night stand that I'm reading or will be starting soon:

Awesome New Music

Brandon Heath is one of my favorite musicians. He is an incredible song writer. I was psyched to pick up his new album called Leaving Eden debuted at #1 on the Billboard contemporary Christian chart. This song called "Your Love" from the CD is one of the best tunes I've heard in a long time. Definitely a must-listen. Enjoy!

New Music From Paul Cardall

A few nights ago our kids were thrilled to have piano-playing royalty come to our house. The kids were mesmerized that Billboard Recording Artist Paul Cardall was in OUR living room. Playing OUR piano.


Paul and his wife Lynnette have been friends for many years and we always have fun whenever we are able to get together. There was more than one occasion when I laughed so hard that Diet Mountain Dew almost came out of my nose. (Now that could have been embarrassing to have a fizzy wet spot down my shirt and lap.)

I have good news for you: Paul has a brand new CD called "New Life" coming out February 14th! I have heard the album and can attest that it is nothing short of awesome. Remember when you were in middle school and Bon Jovi was the most awesome thing ever? Yea - it's that awesome (minus the long, flowing mullet). The background orchestra is enough to give you chills. (But not the same kind of chills you would get if you spilled Diet Mountain Dew down your lap. Thank goodness.) If you're a fan of piano music this is definitely one to check out. You can click here to pre-order.

Kids+Basketball=Funny

My nine year old boy Jackson loves basketball. He loves to watch it and he loves to play it. He was thrilled when we told him he could sign up for the city basketball league. Our family had the pleasure of going to his first basketball game a few weeks ago.

In a proud parent moment, Jackson scored HALF of the team's points for the game! Half!

Incidentally, scoring half of the team's points meant making one basket.

In a shocking conclusion, Jackson's team total of four points was not enough to hold off the opposing team. Who'd have thunk. I am thankful that at this age the kids aren't crazy-competitive and can still say after the game that they had fun, even if they did get creamed. Behold......Jackson's two points:

The School Food Fight

I went to Eastmont Middle School which apparently didn't have it in the budget to buy a power generator.

And you're asking yourself "Who cares?" Well, I care. Because I nearly lost my life as a result of their lack of a generator to create electricity in the event of a power outage.

The design of Eastmont is unique. The lunch room is right in the middle of the school, and then hallways surround the lunch room, which lead to class rooms. So the middle of the school has not seen a ray of sunlight since the roof was put on.

So one day me and the rest of my I'm-really-nerdy-but-I-think-I'm-awesome friends were eating lunch in the dungeon cafeteria. And then the power goes out. It's pitch black. You can't see your hand in front of your face. You are enveloped by a sea of darkness. And immediately chaos erupted. I'm talking ERUPTED.

Two things happened instantaneously. 1) Lots and lots of screaming. And 2) Food started flying everywhere. EVERYWHERE. And then I started to hear the ringing of silverware hitting the tables and floor. People were chucking their forks! And then I heard the banging of cafeteria trays. People were chucking their trays! Me and my I'm-really-nerdy-but-I-think-I'm-awesome friends feared for our lives.

A miracle happened at Eastmont Middle School that day. I was not hit by one piece of flying silverware, nor one solitary tray. I was shocked that I hadn't become a casualty of this spontaneous war in the dark. In less than 30 seconds the lights came back on and we were amazed to see the battle field which had been created. I wouldn't be surprised if Eastmont came up with some money after that experience to buy a generator.

Our Airport Mishap

Neither my wife or I may be the brightest light bulb on the chandelier although we can usually fend for ourselves. But we seem to have more than our share of glitches when it comes to traveling.

We had some free airline tickets to use after our Hawaii glitch where an engine went out as we were flying above the ocean, we had to return to land, were welcomed on the runway by a line of fire trucks and ambulances, and then got to spend a day of our vacation in Portland while they fixed the airplane.

So a few weeks ago we decided to use our tickets for a spontaneous trip to California to run in the Southern California Half Marathon. (To be honest with you, I contemplated letting the tickets go to waste because I positively despise, fear, and loathe airplanes.)


We got to the airport in Las Vegas and passed the sign showing which gate each flight was departing from. Mel said it was gate D36. I just walked by it quickly but when I glanced I thought it said D26. I brought this up to her but she said it was indeed D36. I am a man, and don't pay attention to details so I trusted that my wife knew what she was talking about.

It turns out that this was one of the very, very few times where I was right.

I mentioned my concern a few more times but she reassured me that we were just fine. We joked that it would be funny if we were sitting at the wrong gate. Well......we waited and waited at D36 and the plane was late arriving. We thought that was strange. Everyone seemed to be waiting around, and an attendant said over the loud speaker that the plane would be arriving soon, it would be cleaned quickly, and then we could start boarding.

Then a little while later over the intercom they said the flight to Seattle would be boarding soon! But we weren't going to Seattle. We were going to California. Yep. Our gate was indeed D26! So we ran as fast as we could through the airport to the other side of the terminal. When we were nearing the gate we heard over the intercom “Last call for Reese, party of two.” We made it with one minute to spare. And that made for a good laugh.

We didn't tell the other passengers why we got on the plane huffing and puffing.

My Second Birthday

My birthday was one week ago. Much to my dismay, I did not realize that this was also National Hey-Kids-Be-As-Grumpy-As-You-Can Day. Our children played the part well. In fact, I nominated each of them for the award of Most Likely To Make Your Parent Go Psychotic. Certainly a proud fatherly achievement.

But seriously, the kids were nuts. ALL. DAY. And I'm ashamed to say that this rubbed off on me also. I was part of stiff competition with the kids to see who could be the grumpiest member of the family. By the end of the night, I may have won (although each of the children apologized, saying "Sorry we ruined your birthday.").

I was not thrilled with the attitude my children had. But I was most disappointed in myself. So I made an official declaration that for this year, my birthday was not going to be on December 19th. I moved it forward a few days to Thursday.

I even went to the store and bought myself some new birthday presents: a $1 bag of butterscotch discs, a bag of Reese's peanut butter cups, and a brownie mix.


I am happy to report that the new birthday was much better than the old birthday. From this day forward, I reserve the right to adjust any birthdays, and I am officially cancelling National-Hey-Kids-Be-As-Grumpy-As-You-Can-Day.

Parents, you're welcome.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from the Reese family! I find it difficult to summarize our awesome year into a few pages. I could be brief and say that we ate lots of snow cones from SnoKaps, and that I recently discovered the heavenly attributes of carne asada French fries from our local Mexican restaurant. But alas, much more has happened.

The kids all have excellent teachers and love school. Our children have even managed to enjoy chicken drumsticks when they have hot lunch, whereas for the average adult, just the sight of these drumsticks would cause dry heaves. They all enjoyed swimming lessons during the summer and have gone positively NUTS with the piano. The girls had fun taking gymnastics lessons this year and Jackson stays busy with scouts.

One highlight of the year was a trip to California to visit Sea World and Lego Land. The worst part of the trip was the flock of birds that lived outside of the windows. They had no concept of “bedtime” and enjoyed chirping at ear-piercing decibels all night long. Mel and I also went to Hawaii in March with two other couples and had a blast. I ate so much pineapple that my blood started to turn yellow.

Mel and I continue to work in the primary at church. Spending time with the kids is great. But I do have one beef with the primary room: the temperature always hovers around 638 degrees. I swear you could put some cake batter in there and have a beautifully cooked cake 30 minutes later.

Mel works a night a week at the hospital and also helps out a little bit at an assisted living facility. She is still very beautiful. She ran her first marathon this year – the Park City Marathon. Then ran a second – the St. George Marathon! At the expo before the race, we sat next to a guy who was 80 years old and running the marathon. I asked him what time he was shooting for and he said around 6 hours and 15 minutes. Mel said “Cool, give me props!” and she held out her fist for props. He just sat there and looked at her. I nudged her to put her hand down NOW! An 80 year old IS NOT going to know what it means to “give you props”.

And then, right before the St. George Marathon started, Mel stepped in a pile of human poop. It sloshed out the holes of her shoe. I believe I earned some Husband Bonus Points for running next to her for the next 26 miles while I smelled her foot.

I continue to my career as a social worker which keeps me busy. I managed to run 5 half marathons and 5 full marathons this year and am looking forward to a race I organized coming up next week: the Hostess Half Marathon. Runners must eat a Hostess product every two miles of the race. Registration filled up quickly and I’m certain there will be some barfing along the way. I signed up to run my first ultra-marathon (50 miles) coming up in March.

Here are a few other highlights from the journal:

January 4, 2010: So a few minutes after I tucked the girls into bed, Danica came down sobbing. She was crying hysterically. You’d have thought someone died. I asked her what was wrong and she said that her tooth got lost in the carpet and she couldn’t find it. I asked how that happened. She explained that her and Kylee thought it would be fun to play catch with her tooth. Two throws later, the tooth was lost in the carpet. With our carpet, finding a tooth is like looking for a needle in a haystack. We looked and looked. She continued to sob the whole time. I heard her whimper “Are you serious?” as she searched the carpet in dismay. We never did find the tooth. Thankfully the Tooth Fairy accepted a note for this tooth also. At least she didn’t eat it, like the first tooth she lost.

January 26, 2010: The Alzheimer’s conference I attended yesterday was at the Senior Citizen Center. Unfortunately lunch was provided by the Senior Center. I was doing my best to enjoy the broccoli cheddar soup when I came across a stringy black hair. Suddenly I didn’t want anymore soup. So I started eating the turkey wrap. With the first bite, I bit into a long brown hair woven between the slices of turkey. Note to self: never eat lunch again at the Senior Center.

April 5, 2010: The hike back was a little more challenging because it was so crazy windy. Kylee had a little stretch where she struggled and said “Dad, both of my legs are really tired.” She was able to keep trucking though. Kylee and I walked together during the hike and pulled up the rear. We had fun talking. She said that she wanted to have lots of animals when she gets bigger. Then she clarified “But I don’t want to be a cowgirl.”

April 26, 2010: We decided to take the kids to the Earth Day celebration in Springdale. On our way up, the kids asked if we could stop and see the ostriches. We agreed to buy a little bag of food for them to feed the ostriches and they were thrilled. Well, somehow Danica managed to grab the fence for a second. And a moment later she was running toward the car crying and screaming. I followed her to the car and she was bawling because she got bit. The guy who owns the ostriches happened to be out there and saw what happened so he brought the kids each a big ostrich feather. That got the tears to stop. Later she said that it scared her more than it hurt. I learned that it’s hard to show sympathy when you are laughing.

May 21, 2010: Apparently at school Dani’s class was supposed to be walking around the track for some reason. According to Dani, her friend Kelsey called over to her to come and look at some lady bugs. So Dani went. And then they got in trouble from Mrs. McCombs for not walking around the track. She put Dani’s name on the chalk board to lose recess the next day.
Danica came home from school distraught. I don’t think she gets into trouble too often so she was worried. She came home and wrote Mrs. McCombs a letter. It said something like “Dear Mrs. McCombs, I’m sorry I was looking at lady bugs. Do you forgive me? Yes or no?” She put it in an envelope and included a pack of Smarties. I asked her the next day what Mrs. McCombs said. She said that Mrs. McCombs forgave her and let her go to recess.

June 1, 2010: On our drive home from San Diego…. One funny thing about the drive home happened when we stopped for lunch at Arby’s. Kylee looked out the window and said “Look at that mof!” We said “What?” She said “Look at that mof!” We asked her again and she said “Mof!” a few more times. We thought it was really cute. Danica was polite in enunciating “mothhhh” instead of “mof”.

August 17, 2010: Jackson ran the Washington County Fair Mile Race. I was standing at the finish line talking to Shelly Thomas and we looked down the road and saw some runners coming. It was too far away so we couldn’t see any details, but Shelly said “It looks like the person in first place is wearing a black shirt. Maybe it’s Jackson!” I vividly remember the image of looking down the road seeing that black shirt and feeling unsure but hopeful. I remember the image so clearly because I thought to myself “That guy is going fast!” As the runners got closer I saw that it was Jackson – and he was in first place! It was really exciting. He ended up winning the mile race with a time of 8 minutes and 55 seconds! That is incredible. That is really fast! He won a ceramic plate and a $20 gift certificate from Classic Sports. I felt very proud of him for all his hard work.

September 21, 2010: I decided to take the kids to SnoKaps Wednesday night which they were excited for. Jackson said “I really hope there aren’t other people there because I want to order Care Bear flavor (cotton candy & wedding cake) but I don’t want other people to hear me order Care Bear.” When we got there, he was relieved that there weren’t other people around. He placed his order: “Can I get a small cotton candy mixed with wedding cake?” A few minutes later the guy opened the window with his snow cone in hand and said “Here’s your Care Bear”. Jackson was mortified. And we all howled with laughter. For the rest of the night, any time the girls saw somebody they said “Jackson likes Care Bears!” We all got a good laugh.

October 11, 2010: At some point during the week Kylee lost her first tooth. It was one of the small ones on the bottom. It was pretty loose so Mel suggested that she tie some floss onto the tooth to pull it out. Plans didn’t work out as well as expected. She kept tugging on it but it wouldn’t come out and Kylee started crying. Unfortunately the floss was tied on really tight and there was no way to get it off, so she either needed to pull it out that night, or go to school the next day with a big piece of floss coming out of her mouth. I took some turns wiggling it, and Kylee took some turns wiggling it, and FINALLY it came out. Thank goodness.

November 12, 2010: Mel made quesadillas for dinner and Kylee must have been pretty tired because she threw a huge fit when the rice was put on the side of the plate instead of inside the quesadilla. She was crying for a while and finally I told her she needed to go to timeout. Then she yelled “You guys aren’t the boss of me! Jesus is!” Mel and I both grinned at each other and bit our lips so we wouldn’t laugh.

November 18, 2010: Mel and the kids raked leaves at Marie’s house. I guess Jackson didn’t realize that there were still tons of leaves on the trees and he said “Mom, this seems a lot easier than last year. Does that mean I’m a man?”

Our family is so blessed. I couldn’t have asked for a better year. (Unless you could erase that little food poisoning incident I experienced in May.) Happy holidays from our family to yours. Wishing you a happy New Year with no hairs in your broccoli cheddar soup! Love, the Reese Gang

The Misery Of Snow Camping

Recently it snowed. Maybe you're thinking "What's the big deal nimrod?" Well, it's a big deal because it hardly ever snows in our lovely neck of the woods. Granted, the snowfall totaled about a fourth of an inch. But hey, it snowed.

It got me thinking about the most miserable experience I ever had in the snow. This traumatizing event was courtesy of the Boy Scouts of America. If ever an act of child abuse was committed, this was it. Our scout leaders had the audacity to......wait for it......wait for it......take us on a winter campout ..... in the mountains ..... in snow up to our waists ..... with no tents. Yep, amigo. You read that right. NO TENTS.

And why weren't there any tents? Because we were about to create a shelter even better than a tent - a snow cave. Whoever's idea this was ought to be shot. The leaders had us take the Lazy-Man-Approach-To-Snow-Caves: we just removed snow from under some picnic tables which were already covered by a few feet of snow. That seemed easy enough.

We situated our bedding in the snow caves, then went to sit around the fire. And I swear to you, without a hint of exaggeration, that my toes froze completely solid. You could have broke them off like peanut brittle. And then it was time to go to bed. And the longest 8 hours of my life began.

My Walmart special sleeping bag didn't quite cut it in the Arctic tundra. I might as well have taken a bed sheet. But wait, it gets worse. After about 15 minutes in our snow cave, it started dripping. And dripping. And dripping. Eventually the top of my sleeping bag was soaking. And the bottom of my sleeping bag was in a puddle of water. And did I mention we were inside SNOW?!?! I'm positive that nobody else inside our cave slept for a single second. But nobody said a word. We all laid there in quiet, tortured silence praying that our lives would end quickly.

I can assure you with full confidence that I will never, ever, ever, never go on a winter camping trip ever again. Never. Ever.

Tomorrow Is A New Day

At This Very Moment

• At this very moment, it is 10:58pm.
• I am staying up until midnight when registration begins for the Utah Grand Slam (run 4 marathons over the course of a few months this summer).
• The Grand Slam is hard to get into, just a limited number of spots. Maybe I could just do it in the morning. But I would punch myself in the ear if by chance other neurotic people are sitting around their computers too, and when I wake up in the morning all the slots are filled.
  
• Part of me is thinking this is foolish. I must have been dropped on my head too many times as a child.
• Do yourself a favor and read THIS blog post by Fat Cyclist about getting a massage. I laughed until I cried.
• I didn't eat hardly any junk food today.
• (I had to make up for multiple indiscretions yesterday.)
• The latest book I'm reading is called Overdosed America. I highly recommend it, although it will make you nervous to go to the doctor.
• Eggnog? I saw eggnog at the grocery store today and thought to myself "Does anybody really drink eggnog?" The very word sounds yucky. Why would someone willingly put something into their stomach that ended with "nog"?
  
• Is it midnight yet?